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Single black female, addicted to retail

As I sit here, a new year and ask myself why is no room in my closet, on my side or James', under my bed, in the hall closet or on the rolling rack, I start to wonder if maybe I have a small shopping problem.  Now to me, it's only small because I am in no way close to being a shopping addict as I would never spend money that should go towards bills or savings to crave a spending habit.  The bad part about what I have is that I don't remember buying half of this stuff and herein lies my problem.  I call myself trying to curtail my addiction by beginning a 'look book.' Something similar to what designers use to showcase their new collections, my 'look book' contains images cut out of magazines that I wanted to buy, it includes clothing, shoes, jewelry, makeup, underclothes, furniture, decorating ideas, recipes and positive quotes or sayings.  I started this 'look book' in January for 2011 and I have a new one for 2012.  What I love about my book the most is that it is kind of like shopping in a way, lol... I see an item in a magazine, think to myself, "Oh yes, this has to be mine," and I cut it out and add it to my book, two days later, I look back in my book and it is still there, almost like seeing the items in my closet that I only wear once or twice due to my obsession with not being caught dead in past trends or out of season items.  This fashion bible of mine is like a guide to who I am, fashion-wise, and what I like.  There is no better feeling than looking in my book and being able to put an 'x' over an item that came and went like the trend of color block clothing.  I feel proud when I look back and realize that I didn't actually go out and spend money on the 120% marked up item, that I would have to turn around and sell at 90% off.  It's like I dodged a financial bullet.

I had a friend who use to call me and sing, "single black female, addicted to retail" in her Kanye West voice and that made me wonder, could I be?  They say most black women shop to impress others, so had I fallen into the trap of spending money on brands that rappers made famous and that I would know nothing about if I watched something that might increase my IQ rather than lower it, otherwise known as, reality TV.  Did I once try to justify spending $700 on a purse, saying that I have owned this purse for eight years and it's just as if I bought an $80 purse every year since then, I just decided to buy one that lasts.  That's still a pretty damn good excuse though.

It's inevitable, we have to buy clothes, so why not splurge a little.

Once again, I am cleaning out my pending blog posts and this one was written quite some time ago.  Sad to say, not much has changed as it relates to my shopping addiction. My recent purchases include, new black studded combat boots, a high-low hem skirt, a bright orange blazer and a side-cross necklace, trendy or what?!?!?!

light.and.airy.

Oh so #random

As a former school teacher I am obsessed with correct grammar and correcting everyone elses grammar.  Now I am not claiming that I never make grammatical errors, but when I write, not just on this blog, I read it at least 10 times to make sure it makes sense, both common and logical. Sometimes I just want to say F*#K correct grammar, F*%K the rules, F@#K your opinion. so here she blows:

this is about as raw as it gets, i just hung up on my husband, mean yes, but i did not want to hear a joke at that moment.  i felt the smart remark was unnecessary and quite frankly unwarranted, reading that back i realize how mean that may sound, if you are not married, i don't expect you to understand and if you are, then i am sure you do.

i notice it is a lot harder to type without following the AP stylebook and everything else i learned as a child in grade school.  i still double space after a period and put commas when i take a breath.  i wanted this to blog to be light.and.airy. because today, i don't want to take myself so serious. it is a holiday for crying out loud.  i take myself so seriously 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 52 weeks a year, i think i owe it to myself to just RE-frickin-LAX.  today, i want to be horse back riding in the Palisades, walking along the beaches of the pacific ocean, climbing to the top of the mountain and screaming as loud as i can.  i need a woo-sah moment.

And as bad as I want to just say 'ef' it, it's a lot harder to be light.and.airy, especially for someone who has been described as; obsessive, compulsive and anal, "But we mean it in the best way!" LOL.  It's super hard to just ignore grammatical errors, but I am not going to fix them just because that would defeat the purpose of my post in the first place. 

FYI, this blog was written at least a year ago, I probably shouldn't posted it because I am not even sure where I was going with it. I know I had a point when I wrote it, but because I can barely remember what I wore three days ago, I can't remember the explanation for this one.  But hey, what I do know is that I no longer hanging up on my hubby and that woo-sah moment that I so desperately needed, has been found.

Fun lines and fun times... twenty eleven

I love facebook, really I do, and I also love some of the facebook apps, for example:

That's what I said in 2011...

And this is what I did...

Now off to Target I go...

Read, think and live then repeat...

Tonight will be filled with church goers, party hoppers and baby makers, all hoping for a better year then the last... As I look over 2011, I am grateful for the trials and triumphs and the blessings and beginnings.  In 2011, I got married, met great people, left a dead-end job, started a new job, lost my dog, adopted two new dogs, gained some weight, loss some weight, loved DTLA, hated DTLA, prayed, moved, laughed, cried, gossiped, screamed, bought way more stuff then needed, gave some items away, bought more items because I gave some items away, this is in addition to buying way more stuff then needed by the way.

For me, resolutions don't work, why wait for a new year to make promises of changes that should have been done way back when.  I am not knocking anyone that does, I am just letting you know what doesn't work for me...

So instead of making resolutions, I made a list of 12 credos (12 for that person that likes the 12 for 2012 idea) read them, think about them and live them:

1.   Pray daily
2.   Don't smoke, not even occasionally
3.   Be physical for 30 minutes
4.   Stress less
5.   Relax more
6.   Say please and thank you
7.   Sleep 7-plus hours a night
8.   Take a multi-vitamin
9.   Ignore negativity
10. Keep a journal
11. Apologize
12. Make sure the people that you love, feel loved

Do you know a baby with a fever?

Okay, the title isn't meant to be literal, but I wonder where's the baby with the fever because I can't, shall not, will not, be getting baby fever.  I mean, it's just not time to be thinking about babies, well I can think about them, but I shouldn't be thinking about them, in my belly, on my hip, in my backseat.  Could it be that not only is my very best friend preggers, but I can probably name twenty women that I personally know who are preggers or who just had a baby.  There must be something in the air, no, something in the water, no, I know what it is, there is something "in the facebook."  If I wasn't on facebook, I would not know so many women who were pregnant and therefore, I would not be getting baby fever, I mean, I would not know a baby with a fever.

A friend of mine and I were just talking about how we are of a particular age and we do not have kids.  We began to justify it by talking about all the women we went to school with that do not have children yet, we could only name about five women, but hey that was enough.  We then began talking about her aunt who didn't have her first kid until she was 38 and then she managed to have a second within nine months.  So needless to say, at this point we were feeling pretty good about ourselves. We ignored the subtle hints that our eggs were trying to tell us by even having this conversation.  She laughed when I told her that my mind starts spinning when I think that I will be fifty when my child goes to college, counting the half a year it may take to get pregnant and the other nine months that it will take to cook the baby.  Then it's like I couldn't stop the thoughts, fifty when they are in college, sixty, if they wait until thirty+ to have kids like me, and we can cancel the thought of me ever being able to meet my great grandkids.  That had us almost in tears, she mentioned that she was babysitting for the night and she was sure by morning that the fever, I mean feeling would be gone.  By the end of the conversation we went from wanting to have kids to feeling great about being career minded women who put accomplishments, family and marriage first.  We toasted through the phone to the FEVER, for it was nothing more than a word.

But in the event that you have an actual fever, here are some facts that should be of assistance...


FEVER CATEGORIES:


99.0-99.5 RANGE: SLIGHT - Continue normal activities with caution. 
(Mrs. Draine, we would advise that if you plan on having kids, you should start working on it now)

99.6-101.9 RANGE: MILD - take little action, stay at home, sleep and rest.

(Mrs. Draine, because you are over 30, you might want to be a little cautious when doing certain activities)

102.0-102.9 RANGE: MODERATE- drink lots of fluids (at room temp of 72), sleep and rest, don't use fever reducers yet.  (Mrs. Draine, sleep and rest will be your best friend, stay off your feel, elevate them and stay hydrated)

103.0-104.9 RANGE: SEVERE - get to a doctor, use fever reducers sparingly (keep temp between 100-102 degrees to fight off your illness), get lots and lots of rest, eat lots of food to ensure the digestive system is still functioning normally! (Mrs. Draine, because you are over 30, we may need to think about some alternatives)

105.0-106.6 RANGE: DANGER- call 911, get immediate medical attention. 
(Mrs. Draine, what have you been doing for the last ten years?)

106.7+: LIFE-THREATENING- death or coma is possible, dial 911, and get medical attention right away. Hyperpyrexia causes fevers this high.
(Mrs. Draine, having a child at this age has serious risks associated)

So to the baby with the fever, the plural noun, (2) A state of nervous excitement or agitation, take a deep breathe and concentrate on something else.  After all, it was just a dream...

Dear Harold Camping...

I was really ang, angry, angr, well, not really angry but frustrated I guess with what's going on in the world.  Harold Camping spent millions of dollars on a campaign to let people know that the world was coming to an end, that earthquakes would ravish the land and all children of GOD would be lifted up for eternal life with the LORD.  My question to Harold is, what now? You scared thousands of people, me excluded, although I did put my most valuable belongings in one safe place in the event that scientists caused another man-made disaster, but that is another story.

I am also frustrated because for a brief moment, I did panic.  We as Christians can not leave it to the church to teach us everything there is to know about the bible.  Pastors teach that being a Christian isn't just coming to church on Sunday, singing some songs, listening to the word while nodding and agreeing and the benediction.  We are to spread the word and live by the word.  So in leu of this false rapture, I have decided to commit to reading the bible on my own.  I really feel bad for the people who cleaned out their life savings, sold their homes and cars, used their last bit of money on a vacation or confessed some things that we all know should be taken to the grave.

Well for me, there is a blessing in everything and what this non-rapture taught me is that we do not know the day nor the hour that we will die, be it of a human disaster or an angelic miracle, but what I do know is that I can strive to become a better Christian and a better person.  I can give the homeless person on the corner a few bucks because I would probably spend it on something that will make me gain weight or breakout.  I know everyone thinks that when you give money to the homeless that they are just going to spend it on getting high, maybe and maybe not, that's not for me to question, all I can do is try to help people, a little at a time.  I can also spend a few hours out of my month volunteering at some kind of shelter or non-profit, because in those few hours that I am helping others, I am saving my brain from getting dumbed down by reality television.  Instead of having my annual yard sale, this year, I can give away the clothes that in my own little conceited way are not good enough for me to wear again because I have gotten caught up in the 'out of season' hype.  The little money I would make from a yard sale would probably go towards another gadget that will be considered 'out of date' in about eight months.  When looking (reading) back, I realize that I have a lot of room for growth.

So where I started out being frustrated by Harold Camping, I would like to take this moment to thank him for this moment of clarity.  People always ask, what would you do if you knew you were going to die? Common answers of course are: spend all of my money, go on a lavish trip, skydive, take all the risks that with the blessings of continued life, I would not have enough nerve to try.  But for me, I would want to help someone else have a better day than they were having, a better week than the week before or a better year than the last.